Monday, August 12, 2013

The Scoop on Our Adoption 1/20/10

As most of you know, we have decided to adopt.
All in all it was our decision, but largely in part it was chosen for us...
Given to us
as a gift from the Lord.

There were many years prior to marriage,
where Brian and I would talk and dream of adopting.
When it came down to it,
I was afraid.

Anytime, anyone would mention adoption,
while we were still trying to have our own,
I would quickly shut down.

The Lord has opened my heart
wide open to it again.
And now we wait...
wait in eager expectation to see what God is going to do.

I just recently read a book given to me by my pastor
First Love by Ann Kiemel Anderson
It was incredible.
For the first time,
I was able to relate with someone's family journey.

She wrote: 
"for years I thought I would NEVER be a mother. that the road would NEVER turn a corner. yes. my childhood dream of motherhood had to die before God could resurrect it in a far more powerful way than I ever imagined."

How true this statement is.
God is resurrecting this dream in our lives
that it far more powerful than we've ever imagined it to be.

Let me answer some of the questions you might be asking:
1. Who are you adopting through?
We are adopting through the House of Ruth.
I hyper-linked to their website, but I will try to summarize them for you. House of Ruth is a ministry. It is not an adoption agency. What is the difference? Well, there are a number of differences. House of Ruth facilitates adoptions that are primarily focused on the birth-mother. Their ministry is to woman who have found themselves in a crisis pregnancy and are faced with some big decisions. An adoption agency, primarily is focused on matching a family to a baby. Whereas, House of Ruth, is more focused on:

1) Preventing Abortion: Helping the women to see and understand the life that is in them.
2) Exploring all of the options for these women: Their goal is always to keep the baby and mother together, whether it be by providing resources directly or finding family that is willing and able to help.
3) Having families ready to adopt, when all of the options have been explored, and the mother simply cannot keep her child. This decision is always made out of a very humble place, knowing she cannot provide the type of home, family, life that she would like to.

House of Ruth facilitates round about 50 to 60 adoptions a year.
2) Will your adoption be open? What does open mean? 
Yes...we will have an open adoption, which means we will maintain and open relationship with the birth-mother throughout our child's life. The level of openness is largely in part determined by us....what we are comfortable with. Could be pictures once a year...could be a visit once a all depends and unfolds as we go along.
3) What does the process look like?
Well, in order to answer this question, I will preface it by saying that each organization has a different procedure that they follow.
Let me break this down into what we have completed thus far and what we yet need to complete.
-initial application
- orientation meeting
-Filing Paperwork: Birth-mother letter, Detailed info on us, photo collage, two letters of recommendation, pastoral recommendation.
-Interview to be approved and placed in the system.
Needs to be Completed-Preliminary Home Study: the state of California requires a state licensed social worker to perform a "home study." They will come and interview us...look at our home...Pretty much they are trying to make sure that there will be no more children placed in the "system" as a result of this adoption.
-Placement: A birth-mother picks us using our "birth-mother letter" and references...we meet with her, pray, and decide if it's a good fit.
If it is a good match (on average this is 2 month-ish before the baby is born...can be the day of :)...We pick of the baby the day he/she is born
-Adoption lawyer is contacted and legal paperwork is prepared.
-Post-placement Home Study: Social Worker revisits us with the baby in the home.
-Adoption is completed via the adoption lawyer.

So....That's the Scoop.
Ultimately, right now we are waiting...waiting to be chosen by a birth-mother.

What questions do you have about adoption...About what we are doing?
I know I have missed a lot, as there is a lot to what we are doing, but your questions will help me:)

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