2010...my year to wait upon the Lord ALWAYS expecting...
Expecting him to show up.
You see I have lived most of my life without this expectancy.
I have lived always expecting the worst and being pleasantly surprised at the best.
This has been not a choice out of humbleness or anything other than:
FEAR
You see Fear is my biggest opponent right now.
Fear seems to lurk at the doorstep of my heart daily...
Knocking, waiting for me to agree with it.
Convincing me that expecting the worst is the smartest way to live.
"Why expect God's best when he may not come through?" Fear exclaims.
"Expect the worst....it's the only way to protect yourself.
You don't want to hurt like you've been hurt before...do you?"
This way of thinking has been my defense mechanism.
A way to protect myself from the pain...
the hurt that comes when you expect the best and well,
the best isn't what you get (Seemingly).
The first thing that our adoption coordinator said when we sat down with us was...
"You must believe that this (adoption) is God's BEST for you. Adoption is not second best. It is not the runner up choice...it is God's very best for you and Brian."
Obviously, this was a divinely spoken word to start out our conversations.
Seeing our story.
I have not always believed that God has had his best for us.
In fact, I have come to believe that God chose us for second best.
Contrary to my beliefs, the truth is that this IS God's best for our lives.
I can expect God to show up in our story with the VERY BEST!
I am slowly, beginning...fighting to really believe this.
I am daily choosing to believe that God is here...
in this.
He has his best for us. For our family.
2010...I can believe for God's best for us.
You see I LOVE to give gifts.
No joke.
When I say LOVE. I mean LOVE.
Just ask some of those that really know me.
Wherever I go, I am looking for gifts for my family and friends.
Not like the kind of gift where you realize that some one's Birthday is coming up,
and you feel obligated to get a gift kind of gift.
BUT...I naturally am always looking for the "just because" gifts.
Nothing brings me greater joy than finding and giving the perfect gift.
As I have made the decision to ALWAYS expect God to show up,
I have realized that this is God's heart for me.
Really...He is always doing the same thing.
Looking for opportunities to give me the PERFECT gift.
I won't give a gift unless it is the BEST.
I will wait until I find the BEST.
I am coming to find that God is similar in this.
He sometimes waits, so he can give me the VERY best.
You see...living in a place where you always expect the best.
Always expecting God to show up.
It changes everything.
If God really is who he says is
and if God really can do what he says he can do,
When he shows up,
EVERYTHING changes...EVERYTHING.
So pretty much. Fear will just have to take a back seat.
I am waiting with expectancy.
Waiting for the BEST!
What's a word you are believing for your life this year?
Love,
Expecting him to show up.
You see I have lived most of my life without this expectancy.
I have lived always expecting the worst and being pleasantly surprised at the best.
This has been not a choice out of humbleness or anything other than:
FEAR
You see Fear is my biggest opponent right now.
Fear seems to lurk at the doorstep of my heart daily...
Knocking, waiting for me to agree with it.
Convincing me that expecting the worst is the smartest way to live.
"Why expect God's best when he may not come through?" Fear exclaims.
"Expect the worst....it's the only way to protect yourself.
You don't want to hurt like you've been hurt before...do you?"
This way of thinking has been my defense mechanism.
A way to protect myself from the pain...
the hurt that comes when you expect the best and well,
the best isn't what you get (Seemingly).
The first thing that our adoption coordinator said when we sat down with us was...
"You must believe that this (adoption) is God's BEST for you. Adoption is not second best. It is not the runner up choice...it is God's very best for you and Brian."
Obviously, this was a divinely spoken word to start out our conversations.
Seeing our story.
I have not always believed that God has had his best for us.
In fact, I have come to believe that God chose us for second best.
Contrary to my beliefs, the truth is that this IS God's best for our lives.
I can expect God to show up in our story with the VERY BEST!
I am slowly, beginning...fighting to really believe this.
I am daily choosing to believe that God is here...
in this.
He has his best for us. For our family.
2010...I can believe for God's best for us.
You see I LOVE to give gifts.
No joke.
When I say LOVE. I mean LOVE.
Just ask some of those that really know me.
Wherever I go, I am looking for gifts for my family and friends.
Not like the kind of gift where you realize that some one's Birthday is coming up,
and you feel obligated to get a gift kind of gift.
BUT...I naturally am always looking for the "just because" gifts.
Nothing brings me greater joy than finding and giving the perfect gift.
As I have made the decision to ALWAYS expect God to show up,
I have realized that this is God's heart for me.
Really...He is always doing the same thing.
Looking for opportunities to give me the PERFECT gift.
I won't give a gift unless it is the BEST.
I will wait until I find the BEST.
I am coming to find that God is similar in this.
He sometimes waits, so he can give me the VERY best.
You see...living in a place where you always expect the best.
Always expecting God to show up.
It changes everything.
If God really is who he says is
and if God really can do what he says he can do,
When he shows up,
EVERYTHING changes...EVERYTHING.
So pretty much. Fear will just have to take a back seat.
I am waiting with expectancy.
Waiting for the BEST!
What's a word you are believing for your life this year?
Love,
Me.
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